


Like a Dog to Water

by Pollydoodles



Series: The Pizza Dog Chronicles [13]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, pizza dog - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-26
Updated: 2016-04-29
Packaged: 2018-06-04 17:39:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6668107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pollydoodles/pseuds/Pollydoodles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Barton won't be happy when he finds out you drowned his dog.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One: The Plan

“Barton won't be happy when he finds out you drowned his dog.” 

Natasha delivered her verdict across the breakfast table as Darcy finished explaining her next great plan to get Lucky back into the shape God had originally intended for him. Bucky nodded along with Darcy fervently and then slipped the toast from his plate into the waiting dog’s mouth. Banner noticed and choked on his tea laughing, managing to swallow both the laugh and the tea down when Darcy threw him a questioning look. 

“We're not going to drown the dog.” Darcy protested, reaching across the table to stick her knife firmly in the marmalade, rolling her eyes at Natasha who barely flicked her eyes over the morning’s newspaper at the other girl. Lucky pushed his head back adoringly against Bucky’s thigh as the man ruffled his ears, before padding his way under the table, dodging legs, towards Jane who absentmindedly dropped the leftover bacon strips from her plate towards him. He snapped them up, licking his chops repeatedly and chasing the salty taste across them. 

“Of course they won't.” Tony declared. Darcy shot him a suspicious look, he winked at her and continued. “Fat floats. That dog'll never sink, he's way too buoyant.” He shovelled a large forkful of scrambled eggs into his mouth, only just chewing it and swallowing before opening his mouth to continue. He raised his fork and pointed at Steve. “Rogers is the one that's going to sink like a stone; all that muscle.”

Lucky barged his way from Jane to Stark, weaving in and out of the legs that converged under the table, and parked his ass patiently in front of Tony. His tail wagged slowly, and he was rewarded with half a sausage snuck under the table for his troubles. He chomped thoughtfully, glancing around to consider his next option. 

“Oh no, I'm uh, I'm not going in.” Steve blushed and held his hands up, shaking his head slightly as he did so. 

“What, why? I need you!” Darcy said plaintively, turning to him with the biggest eyes she could muster, the glob of marmalade slipping off the end of her knife unnoticed and dropping to the table. Lucky, spying an opportunity; forced his way between her and Steve, head jammed up against the table and long pink tongue darting out to catch the fallen preserve. With three short smacking licks, he’d cleared it completely. 

“I uh, huh,” Steve blushed as he stuttered, pushing Lucky away from the table forcibly. “I can't swim.”

“What?” Darcy said, surprised. “No, look, Steve - he's just joking, you won't sink.” She stuck her knife back into the marmalade jar, determined this time to get it on her toast. Balancing the blob carefully on the edge of her cutlery, she transferred it back to her plate, only to find that her last slice of toast was gone, save a few odd bits dotted across the plate. Frowning slightly, she glanced to her right and Bucky smiled back at her, chewing thoughtfully, little crumbs still clinging to his lips. She sighed, unable to find herself irritated with him. His hand snuck into her lap and held onto hers, squeezing tightly. 

“Well he might, muscle is a lot heavier than-“ Tony interrupted, and several pairs of eyes flicked to him, then back to Steve, who blushed furiously and poured himself another cup of coffee as a distraction. Bucky tilted his head to one side, considering the other man, who grinned back at him from the other end of the table. Lucky had looped back round to him and had leaned his whole head into the soldier’s lap, pink tongue lolling and nose snuffling across Bucky’s forearm. 

“Stark, shut it.” Darcy said firmly, looking around for another slice of toast. 

“No, Darcy, really I-I can't swim. I never learned.” Almost every set of eyes turned to Steve then, including the incredulous brunette perched next to him. Bucky, for his part, was engrossed in feeding the dog handfuls of scrambled egg from his plate, laughing softly to himself as the hound licked all over his palms enthusiastically. 

“I- what really?” Darcy swivelled on her seat to face Steve fully, who looked very much as though he’d like the ground to open up and swallow him, shield and all. He cleared his throat, hoping she’d get the message, but those big blue eyes were staring up at him as though she simply couldn’t comprehend what it was that he was saying. 

“Well, there wasn't a lot of call for it, then there was a war on and then, well-“ He trailed off, poking at what was left of the bacon on his plate with his fork, pushing it from one side to the other, smearing ketchup across the bright white ceramic. 

Lucky pushed his nose, wet and snuffling, into Pepper’s lap. Without taking her eyes off Steve, still squirming awkwardly under the scrutiny of the team gathered at the table, she slipped the little bowl of muesli in front of her onto the floor. Lucky stuck his face in it enthusiastically and Pepper slipped one delicate foot out of her Prada heels and rubbed it against his side. His tail thumped happily against her legs and she smiled to herself. 

“World's longest audition for Icecapades.” Tony supplied helpfully, pouring himself more coffee and smiling brightly. Pepper kicked him under the table, angling the toe of her shoe neatly into his ankle. He winced. 

Darcy sighed. “Okay look - just, get in the pool, if we're trying to exercise Lucky we might as well teach you to swim whilst we're in there.” Steve grunted in response, already thinking of at least five different ways to get out of it. Tony looked over at him and snorted, guessing what was going through the soldier’s head. 

“What about you, Tinman?” He said, peeling an orange expertly and throwing a segment into his mouth. Bucky looked up at him, expectantly. He’d learned to recognise the various names Tony liked to throw his way, even if he didn’t really understand them. Steve frowned. It was hard enough bringing Bucky along the road to finding himself without Tony muddying the waters; but then again it was quite possibly harder to stop Stark doing that than it was to rehabilitate the Winter Soldier. 

“Do you need swimming lessons too, or do you, you know, rust?” 

Darcy hit him in the head with a rolled up pair of socks she’d pulled from her pyjama pocket – Steve recognised the distinctive pattern of cartoon dogs etched across them as they flew past his face, and realised they belonged to his friend – and Bucky grinned. 

“I can swim.” He said, patting Lucky.

“Well then.” Natasha said, one perfect arched eyebrow taking them all in as her gaze swept the table, letting them all know exactly what she thought of the whole thing. “You’re going to drown Steve and the dog. Busy morning.”

“We’re not drowning anybody.” Darcy insisted, pushing her chair back and standing up, huffing as she did so. “I’m going to exercise Lucky, teach Steve to swim, it’s all going to be fine.” Her cheeks flushed pink as she addressed the table. Jane noticing the warning signs of a full-on Lewis meltdown, hurriedly pushed her chair back as well and collected up her empty plate and dirty cutlery. She gave Darcy a comforting squeeze on the shoulder as she passed on her way to the dishwasher. Darcy took a deep breath. 

“He’s a Labrador, they're water dogs.” She continued, and Steve looked at her in a manner that suggested very much that he was wondering if he was water-based at all. 

“I thought they were gun dogs?” Bruce offered, mopping up the last of the ketchup on his plate with half a hash brown. 

“He's a pizza dog.” Bucky said brightly. 

“Now that-“ Tony said, pointing a fork in Bucky’s direction. “Is the most accurate thing any of you have said all morning.”


	2. Part Two: The Execution

"I - Do you all really need to be here?" Steve asked, colouring slightly as he looked around him and realised how many bodies occupied sunloungers around the roof-top pool.

"I'm here for Darcy."  
"I'm here to see if you drown."  
"I'm here to check you out in swim shorts." 

The last was from Natasha, who flicked down her sunglasses briefly and ran her eyes up Steve's body. His hands shot to the front of his shorts, trying in some small way to cover himself, and he blushed further. She laughed and pushed them back up her nose, disappearing behind the cover of a well-worn, dog-eared and battered romance novel. The heavily-muscled man on the front cover looked suspiciously like Thor. 

Bucky appeared, the dog on his heels as usual, a waddling golden shadow that bumped its nose into the back of Bucky’s bare legs as he wandered over towards the pool. Darcy glanced up and over at him, and had to clap a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. Steve, looking down at her and frowning, span on his heel to face Bucky, attempts to cover his dignity forgotten as his jaw dropped and his hands fell to his sides. Natasha’s book sank slowly in front of her as she pushed her sunglasses up into her hair. 

Bucky grinned back at them happily, seemingly unaware of the surprise he’d caused by his appearance, running his right hand through his shaggy dark hair, his metal hand pulling lightly on Lucky’s ears. The dog panted happily and leaned bodily into the man’s leg, rolling his head back to push a wet nose into Bucky’s skin and gazing up at him adoringly. 

“What on earth is he wearing?” 

Jane, gracelessly gate crashing the conversation, stood stock still behind Bucky, her pretty printed kaftan rippling in the slight breeze and her mouth open. Darcy made a frantic shut up motion with her hand across her face, but her boss was still staring goggle-eyed at the ex-assassin in front of her, clad only in bright blue swim shorts with the Captain America shield logo printed vividly across both his crotch and his ass. 

“He needed shorts.” Tony shrugged. “Y’know, you could’ve had some too, Steve. You only had to ask.” 

“Are they yours?” Darcy asked with a sly tilt to her head as she turned to look at him, and Stark scoffed. 

“You’re kidding me right? Mine are red and gold, baby. Red and gold.”

"C'mon Steve." Darcy nudged at the soldier with her hip, pulling at the bottom of her shirt and tugging it over her head. Her swimsuit was black, and practical. No sense falling out all over the place. Especially in front of Stark, who pulled a mock-disappointed face then grinned as she stuck her tongue out at him in return. He turned back to the barbeque, having already declared that if they were having pool-side entertainment, the least they could do was have appropriate food. Sausages sizzled invitingly, and Lucky slunk, belly low to the ground, towards Stark and the dazzling scent of cooking meat.

They stood together at the edge of the pool, Bucky hovering behind and Steve staring down at the water with a look of trepidation splashed all over his face. Darcy sighed. "Steve, you're over 6 foot and this is the shallow end. When you get in it's gonna come up to like, your chest. At most." He continued to stare down at the clear water, his mouth twisted as if in deep concentration. She rolled her eyes at him. 

Darcy folded herself down to sit on the side of the pool with as much grace as she could muster, considering the audience. Dangling her legs into the pool, she leaned back on her hands and enjoyed the feeling of cool water lapping gently against her skin. The sun beat down against her and she paused for a moment to congratulate herself on a blindingly good idea. So, so much better than the gym. 

Steve clambered down next to her with considerably less grace; which was saying something. Darcy was known for a number of qualities - some of them even good ones - but elegance was not likely to ever be counted amongst them. He sat, apprehensive, legs hitched up in front of him, muscular arms wrapped around impossibly large thighs. His toes danced just above the edge of the water, close to the surface but not quite breaching it. 

Darcy turned to him. "Seriously?"

"What?" He gave her a hurt look in return. 

"You stormed an enemy fortress, on your own, with a tin shield and whilst wearing tights. You can handle a swimming pool." His blue eyes met hers uncertainly, and she tipped her head to one side, a sudden soft smile arching her lips up, and slipped one hand over his. "Promise." She said, voice lowered, and Steve laced his fingers up into hers and squeezed. 

Extracting her hand from his, Darcy slipped off the side and into the water, wincing slightly as the water flushed cold against her body. She turned back to Steve, smiling brightly, and opened her arms wide as she ducked her shoulders under the surface, trying to warm up quickly. She shivered a moment, letting her body adjust to the change in temperature. 

“C’mon, Rogers.” She called, crooking her fingers into a come-here gesture. 

Steve sucked in a breath and dangled his legs, one by slowly controlled one, into the water. He pulled a face. "S'cold." He complained, and she splashed him in response as she swam forward to meet his legs. Grinning, she ran her hands gently up his legs as they dangled in the water and laughed as his skin shivered under her touch. 

“Are you getting in or what?” She said, stepping back from him and raising a hand to shield her eyes as she squinted up at his face, the sun catching behind his head and halo-ing around him like the proverbial angel. He eased his legs further into the water, wincing as the cold water lapped further up his thighs. Inch by miniscule inch Steve edged down, holding himself up on the side of the pool with tensed arms. Darcy fought the urge to pull him in and instead stepped back and watched impatiently whilst six foot odd of muscle shivered as it entered the pool more slowly than 90s dial up internet. 

Bucky appeared behind Steve’s shoulder, a curious look on his face.

“Steve?”

“Yes, Buck.” Steve bit out in response, only half concentrated on his friend’s voice as the water skirted his crotch, yelping and pulling himself back slightly onto the tiled edge. 

“Why aren’t you in the water?”

Steve exhaled hard, tensed as he held himself aloft, biceps straining. “It’s not – I just need to – take it slow.” 

“But… S’fun, Steve.” Bucky responded, his brow furrowing as he tried to roll Steve’s words around his mind and make sense of them. The tilt of his head, letting his dark hair fall across his forehead and into his eyes, suggested he was having trouble with it. 

“Yeah, maybe, Buck-“ Steve bit out, his shoulders starting to shake, not really listening properly to the other man.

A cool metal hand, placed in the centre of his back pushed hard and Steve disappeared under water, unceremoniously swallowing a large amount of water as the rest of his sentence was lost to his fall. Darcy clapped a hand over her mouth and Bucky looked over the edge of the pool interestedly at the flailing form of his best friend. 

Steve broke the surface after a long moment, gasping and hands paddling fast as he found purchase on the swimming pool floor. His bright blues, wide with panic, met Darcy’s own as he fought to catch his breath. He leaned back against the side of the pool, letting his head rest against the tiled edge. Bucky bent over him, his face upside down to Steve as he considered the situation. Lucky appeared at his side, flattened to the floor and pink tongue lolling from his open mouth. Steve endured a long slobbery lick, chin to forehead and grimaced as the dog panted hot breath across his face. 

“Well,” said Darcy, approaching cautiously. “You’re in now. Might as well make the most of it, huh?”

Steve, spluttering, declined to answer. 

It took a little time, and more than a decent amount of persuading, but finally Darcy had Steve by the hand and was firmly leading him into deeper water. She’d been half-swimming for more than a few steps before Steve wasn’t able to touch the bottom of the pool, and when he suddenly yelped and his hand yanked back from hers, she turned, sculling on the spot. 

“Steve?” He disappeared under the surface, and she stared at the bubbles which popped up around his body. “Steve. Steve!” He floundered under the water, and she moved closer, watching him, hesitant and wondering if she’d even be able to haul him back up again. Bucky, having wandered alongside them, padding through pools of warm water splashed on the tiles and heated by the sun, stilled as he looked down at his friend, sinking fast. 

"Wow I... I didn't even realise that was possible." Darcy breathed. 

Steve emerged finally, spluttering. He broke the surface, thrashing furiously and back pedalling in an effort to find the point at which he was still able to stand up. Darcy threw him an awkward smile as he coughed wetly, his blond hair plastered to his head and bare chest glistening under the sheen of water that ran down it. 

"Of course it is. It's simple physics. I did tell you." Tony offered from the pool side, sunglasses perched on top of his head and one eye still on the barbeque as he rotated the sausages. Lucky lay underneath the barbeque, on his back, lazily licking the dripping lines of fat that ran down the legs of the little stand, his tail wagging slowly from side to side. 

"I thought you were just winding Steve up-" Darcy said incredulously. 

"Guys. I sank. Like a stone." Steve managed finally, coughing slightly as he spoke. 

"Aright super-inventor-extraordinaire. You're up." Darcy pointed to Stark, who laid down his spatula and turned with a full faced grin towards the choking super-soldier in his pool. 

"What, no, I don't want-" Steve protested. 

"Come on, Cap. You want to learn to swim or not?"

There was a gurgle as Steve went under again that sounded an awful lot like "or not", albeit expressed in a rather more fervent fashion and not entirely in those words. Darcy shot Stark a look that told him to keep any sarcastic comments about Steve’s choice of words to himself, and floated closer, unsure what to do. 

Tony grinned, and hunkered down to the side of the pool. Bucky bent to his knees next to him, reached past Darcy and grasped Steve firmly with his left arm. Barely a flicker moved across his face as he hauled up the other man, coughing hard from under the water. Steve gasped and put a hand to his chest, thumping hard and bringing up mouthfuls of water. Bucky slipped into the water beside him, wrapping his metal arm firmly around the blond’s chest and pulling him backwards to shallower water. 

"Bucky's just as heavy as me, if not heavier. How comes he doesn't sink?" Steve said with a slight colour of petulance in his voice. 

"I can swim." His friend said simply, still hanging on firmly to one muscled shoulder. 

"You just need to… Paddle." Darcy demonstrated by splashing her hands madly in front of her, and Bucky laughed, still hanging onto Steve’s shoulder firmly. Steve’s shoulders sagged. 

"Okay kids, it's not hard.” Tony said firmly, standing up and reaching behind him for the spatula. Lucky shuffled to one side as the man tried to step over him towards the barbeque. Rolling his eyes at the dog, who merely closed his eyes and flopped onto his back with all four paws in the air, he turned back to the pool, brandishing the spatula as he spoke. “He's going down, he needs something to keep him up until he learns to coordinate those limbs."

"And you suggest?" Darcy asked, arms folded across her chest as she turned away from the soldiers and looked up at Stark. 

"Pool noodle."

Bucky hauled Steve fully into the shallow end and the big blond lay, half in half out of the pool, collapsed over the tiled edge, head resting on his arms and face confused as all hell. Bucky clapped a hand – thankfully the flesh and blood variety – against Steve’s shoulder, forcing out yet more water from his mouth and over the tiled edge of the pool. The blond grimaced and closed his eyes. 

"Noodle singular?" Darcy asked, looking over Steve's bulk critically. 

"We may have a trial and error situation here." Tony allowed. 

Darcy reflected later that the question 'how many pool noodles does it take to keep Captain America afloat?' probably hadn't been asked before, but the answer, as it turned out, was thirty seven. 

"I didn't know we had this many." Tony huffed as he dropped another armful by the pool. 

"It was one of your more eclectic purchases, certainly." Pepper said absentmindedly as she flicked over another page of her book with one hand and passed a tall glass of gin and tonic to Natasha, who was laid out on the lounger beside her. The Russian accepted it, sitting up in one smooth graceful movement, allowing her gaze to sweep over Tony, standing with hands on hips and looking critically down at Steve who was sat on the edge of the pool, awkwardly unable to lower his arms anymore. 

“Is that code for drunk?” Darcy asked, pushing her hair out of her face and glancing back over her shoulder at the slim red-head, now sipping delicately at her own drink, fishing out the little pink umbrella as she did so and adjusting her sunglasses. Pepper smiled and said nothing. Tony winked at the petite brunette and handed her a bundle of noodles. 

“Okay, Double-D, if you just – yeah there, that’s right. And I’ll just snap this on like-“ Tony reached around Steve as far as his arms would allow him, snapping a heavy duty cable tie around three noodles in one go, before shuffling further around and doing the same to another cluster. Darcy, adjusting noodles around Steve’s chest, glanced up into long-suffering blue eyes and bit her lip in an attempt to keep from laughing. 

“Time to get back in the water, Rogers.” She said, looking up at him. He glanced down at the contraption they’d fashioned around his chest, and back up to her eyes. She grinned, and put a hand either side of the polystyrene raft Stark had wound around his chest. “Well, you won’t drown. Not with this lot around you.” Steve, sat on the edge of the pool, legs dangling over the side and either side of Darcy who smiled back at him winningly, sighed heavily. 

She stepped back, and into a solid wall of muscle. Leaning her head back, hitting a hard shoulder, she looked up into Bucky’s face, bent down at her. His dark hair hung around his face in wet strands, little droplets of water clinging to the ends of his eyelashes and his blue eyes bright in the sunshine. Darcy’s heart stuttered slightly in her chest and she sucked in a breath as his hands ran up her arms and squeezed. 

Steve coughed, and Darcy snapped her head back down and forward towards him. 

“Okay Steve, just… Let yourself go.” He fixed her with a look that said she would probably pay for this in some way later, but eased himself off the side and into the water. The noodles affixed around him bobbed upwards, making a break for his chin, but they held. Steve… Floated. 

He looked down at himself, then back up at Darcy and Bucky. 

“Hey,” He exclaimed, pleased. “I’m not sinking!” Darcy laughed, and he paddled forwards, tipped slightly due to the floats strapped around him, but very much not sinking. Bucky surged past Darcy and, clasping onto a handful of noodles, tugged Steve into the deeper part of the pool. The dark-haired man swam with confident one-handed strokes, the other hand still firmly hanging onto Steve’s floatation device. 

Steve, for his part, kicked his legs half-heartedly, grinning. 

“Yup.” Stark said to himself, pulling his sunglasses back onto his nose. “Pool noodles. Solves everything.” 

“He sleeps in your bed with you?” Jane muttered under her breath as the girls sat together on the side of the pool, now comfortably full of barbeque food and watching the soldiers larking about in the water. Darcy, her eyes on Bucky as he jumped on Steve’s back and tried to push the soldier underwater, made a non-committal noise in response. Steve, laughing hard and more comfortable now he was in waist-high water, simply leaned backwards and let the combined weight of their enhanced bodies drop them. Bucky entered the water with a shout and gurgled as he disappeared under the surface, emerging moments later laughing. Jane turned to look at her friend, silent eyes demanding an answer. 

“Sometimes.” Darcy said, a touch of defensiveness in her tone. “When he has a nightmare. It… Helps.”

Jane sucked in a breath as Bucky emerged from the water, sunlight glinting off the droplets clinging to him, his left arm flashing in the light. He threw his head back and the mess of dark hair dripped rivulets of water down his shoulders as his muscles slid easily as he rolled them. 

“I see why you don’t complain.” 

“It’s not like tha-“ Darcy cut herself off as her friend turned to her with a single, arched eyebrow. She sighed in resignation. “Say nothing. To anyone.” Jane mimed zipping her lips shut and gave Darcy a gentle jab in the ribs with the point of her elbow. 

Lucky nosed his way to Darcy’s side, flopping with a sigh next to her, front paws hanging over the edge of the pool and tongue chasing the last taste of a stolen sausage around his mouth. Darcy looked down at him with an exasperated smile. Jane, jerking her head to the side and looking around Darcy, clapped a hand over her mouth before hissing – “We didn’t even get the dog in the pool.”

Darcy glanced down at Lucky, then back over at Steve and Bucky, who were now taking it in turns to see how long they could hold their breath underwater. “Eh,” She said lightly. “It wasn’t a complete waste of time.”


End file.
